Saturday, January 16, 2010

The Telegraph says Ron Paul is 41st most influential conservative in the USA

The UK paper says... of Our Congressman:

41. RON PAUL (96 on the 2007 list)
Congressman for Texas
A sensation of the 2008 Republican primary, the unlikely libertarian rock star is finding his anti-tax, anti-Wall Street, anti-interventionist arguments gaining traction in Congress as the recession continues. His bill to audit the Federal Reserve, which had been subjected to ritual defeat for years, passed the committee stage in the House with 331 co-sponsors. His rage against spending on the war in Afghanistan has made him a strange bedfellow with Democratic Left-wingers.
Online activist networking and small sum fund-raising was crucial to his respectable showing in the primaries though his votes never came near matching the enthusiasm of his supporters, who were dominated by earnest slacker types.
Now 74, the former gynaecologist has represented Texas for most of the past 30 years, and spent much of it arguing against the power of Washington. He refused to support John McCain’s candidacy, instead launching a new organisation, the Campaign for Liberty, down the road from the Republican national convention in St Paul, Minnesota.


Other Texas notables were:

-- Tom DeLay #99


DeLay experienced a dramatic fall from grace in 2006 amid an investigation by a Texas district attorney for allegedly breaching campaign finance laws and dogged by his links to disgraced lobbyist Jack Abramoff. Known as “the Hammer" for his rigid enforcement of party rule in the House of Representatives after the Republican Revolution of 1994. Played a key role in the impeachment of President Bill Clinton in 1998.
He was also a prime mover force behind the so-called 'K Street project' to manoeuvre Republicans into top positions with influential lobbying firms. Now more famous for being a contestant on “Dancing with the Stars”, in a recent political DeLay demanded that Obama show his birth certificate to prove he was an American. Now regarded by most Republicans as a cautionary tale in growing too comfortable with power.


-- Jeb Bush #76

With the slow but steady rehabilitation of the Bush name, the Bush brother who many say was the one who should have been President remains a potential national candidate. A very popular former governor of a major swing state and with proper conservative credentials, if his name hadn’t been Bush, he might have been the ideal candidate for the party in 2008.
Since leaving office in 2007, Bush toyed with running for the Senate seat to be vacated by Mel Martinez and has been active in the think tank Project for the New American Century. Along with Mitt Romney and Eric Cantor he launched the National Council for a New America, designed for Republican leaders with to listen to voters across the country and will remain a powerful voice behind the scenes. Whether he moves to the front of the stage again remains to be seen.


-- Dick Armey #71

An author of the 1994 Contract with America and former House Majority Leader, Armey now leads FreedomWorks, a conservative advocacy organisation.
A Texan libertarian and former economics professor well versed in Washington’s rougher political arts, he was forced to give up an lucrative consultancy with DLA Piper when FreedomWork’s links to populist opposition to health care reform created difficulties with the law firm’s clients. The 69-year-old chain-smoker is a major influence on the tea party movement, which could become the conservative powerhouse in 2010.


-- Rick Perry #51

The longest serving governor in the state’s history, he declared “I am not George Bush” upon succeeding his Lone Star predecessor in December 2000. In April 2009 he declared that he might become a Texan national. “We’ve got a great union. There’s absolutely no reason to dissolve it,” he said at a tea party protest. “But if Washington continues to thumb their nose at the American people, you know, who knows what might come out of that.”
Democrats accused of him being anti-American but many in the conservative base lapped it up. Such secessionist rhetoric may have had more to do with his forthcoming battle with the moderate Kay Bailey Hutchinson in the Republican primary than any serious belief. In November he will attempt to secure an unprecedented third term and he may well be harbouring thoughts of running for the presidential nomination.
A staunch fiscal conservative, the rugged Texan attracted controversy last year by rejecting Obama’s $555 million in federal stimulus money to aide the expansion of unemployment benefits for Texans, only to later request $170 million loan from the government to continue paying out unemployment benefits.


-- Karl Rove #32

Attributed with almost magically dark powers by his detractors, Rove has certainly been one of the most influential and contentious political strategists of his generation. He guided George W Bush into the governor’s mansion in Texas and then to the White House on a narrow base of support. He was awarded effective control of the Republican National Committee and relations with state officials, not to mention a major say in domestic policy, and took much of the credit the party’s Congressional gains in 2002 and 2004.
As the Iraq war grew unpopular, controversy surrounded the administration and Rove’s name was often involved, whether it was the Valerie Plame affair, the missing White House emails or the selective firing of US attorneys. Through the years opponents have claimed Rove was behind dirty tricks – including heightening terror alerts in 2004 when John Kerry improved in the polls – but nothing much has ever stuck.
Since quitting in 2007 he has been a commentator on Fox News and in the Wall Street Journal, offering analysis of the campaign and criticism of the administration that adds a been-there-done-that expertise to his trenchant political stance. His memoirs, due for publication in March, will be worth watching out for. Recently divorced.


-- George W. Bush #12

In 2007, George W. Bush just missed our Top 20 top conservatives list – a provocative and controversial decision but one that reflected his disastrous poll ratings, the dismay of conservatives at out-of-control spending, the colossal mistakes over Iraq and his failure to consolidate the conservative majority he had won. Aides protested that history would vindicate him and already there are signs that this is happening. The Iraq “surge” of 2007 unquestionably won the war and has helped establish a viable democratic state in the heart of the Middle East. There were terrible errors committed along the way but Bush showed the vision and toughness to change course and commit American blood and treasure when all appeared lost.
Bush’s influence endures also because Obama and his advisers seem scarcely able to do anything without referring to his predecessor. This betrays a shallowness that is beginning to wear thin with American voters. With the recent terrorist attacks, Bush’s relentless focus on Islamist terrorism now looks wise rather than obsessive and he bequeathed Obama one of the most impressive members of the current Cabinet – Bob Gates. Bush’s absence from the limelight and his refusal to criticise Obama even through surrogates is to be commended. So too was his personal insistence that led to the transition between the two administrations being one of the smoothest in American history.


I guess this means President George H.W. Bush is officially over the hill now. Furthermore, US Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison has got to be stewing that she didn't make the list while her gubernatorial rival did, but we sincerely hope she does not assault her press secretary over the slight.

Meanwhile, what about the most influential Texan liberals, as seen by the UK paper?

Well, there's only one -- Houston's new mayor, Annise Parker, of whom The Telegraph says:

The first openly gay mayor of one of America’s top 10 biggest cities, polls found that the Democrat’s orientation mattered to only 18 per cent of voters, but it helped that she had been open about her sexuality throughout her public career, which began with election to the city council in 1997.
Formerly the city’s controller, she campaigned on her expertise and financial acumen, rarely mentioning the potential uniqueness of her bid. After her victory she joked that she was "very proud to have been elected the first ... graduate of Rice University to be mayor of Houston".
Aged 53, she has adopted three children with her longtime companion. She arguably has done more for the gay rights cause than a president who has infuriated the community by putting their preoccupations firmly on the back burner.


Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee did not make the list. Whether this is a source of chagrin for her, we do not know, but we would find it a tad irritating, if we were her, to discover that #80 on the Top 100 Liberal list is a dog, which could just as easily been stricken from the list to make room for her.

Read on:

Bo Obama #80
First Dog of the United States (FDOTUS)
A gift to the President from the late Senator Edward Kennedy last April, the new First Dog immediately became a media sensation – and a potent symbol of the uncritical, adoring coverage that the new President has received from the mainstream media. During the campaign, Obama talked often of having promised a puppy for his daughters Malia and Sasha, stipulating that it had to be a hypoallergenic breed because of Malia’s allergies.
After flirting with the idea of getting a “mutt like me”, Obama instead chose a Portuguese Water Dog with an American Kennel Club lineage. The Washington Post was given an “exclusive” for the story and its reporter dutifully described the dog thus: “Bo's a handsome little guy. Well suited for formal occasions at the White House, he's got tuxedo-black fur, with a white chest, white paws and a rakish white goatee.” The White House doles out regular photos of Bo, who has his own blog and several imitators on Twitter. No doubt a book deal cannot be far off.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Pearland preacher makes gay jokes on TV

The Rev. Rick Scarborough, who's held sway over conservative religious matters in Pearland for as long as we can remember, made an appearance on Comedy Central's "The Daily Show." The topic was gay marriage. Sigh.

Click here to watch.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

quote/unquote ...

"How much does Haiti have to suffer before Haitians in the United States are granted Temporary Protected Status. The reason TPS exists... as an option for the President is precisely for moments such as this in Haiti.''
--- US Rep. Lincoln Diaz-Balart in the Miami Herald, before the feds said they would not deport any Haitians back to Haiti, for now, due to the earthquake

“The government should give people the right to see what they want online. The government can’t always tell lies to the people.”
-- Chinese woman who called herself "Bing" (microsoft joke?) about Google's threat to exit China after the government had hacked into gmail accounts of human rights activists

"Economists are people who work with numbers but who don't have the personality to be accountants."
--- anonymous

"What a strange illusion it is to suppose that beauty is goodness."
-- Leo Tolstoy (1828-1910)

"In the end, everything is a gag."
--- Charles Chaplin (1889-1977)


(Editor's note: Wilson in St. Louis compiles "quote/unquote")

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

A look at the Cowboys-Vikings match


From Rich Gosselin, the most-excellent football writer for the Dallas daily:

It will be the goal of the Cowboys’ defense Sunday to take Favre out of his comfort zone. But Minnesota has a talented blocking front with a pair of Pro Bowlers, guard Steve Hutchinson and tackle Bryant McKinnie. The Vikings also will keep a running back or tight end in to protect Favre from the assault of the Dallas front seven.

In 19 NFL seasons, Favre has seen it all. It’s tough to surprise him. But defenses have managed to do so this season with some timely safety blitzes. Favre has been sacked as often by safeties (seven) as outside linebackers. At home in the dome, safeties have twice as many sacks of Favre (two) as linebackers (one).

Wade Phillips will have some defensive decisions to make on gameday. His two safeties, Ken Hamlin and Gerard Sensabaugh, have a combined five sacks in 13 seasons, including none this year. The blitz is not their forte.

The Vikings have three wideouts who can stretch the field. Phillips can play it safe and keep the safeties home to fend off the big play. But then the game will be played on Favre’s terms. Favre wouldn’t expect the Cowboys to send their safeties. That’s all the more reason to send them.

The more comfortable Favre becomes Sunday, the less comfortable the Cowboys will become. And vice versa.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Alicia Keys booty call

"It's like I'm ovulating but the dude version..."

Friday, January 08, 2010

Too bad the Horns lost, but hey, they're already almost #1 in the latest new College Football Top 10!

from the NY Times' college sports blog, The Quad:

1. Alabama – As the defending national champion, the Tide should be a near-unanimous pick for this spot. It returns Mark Ingram, Greg McElroy and a host of talented players on defense.

2. Boise State — The Broncos return 21 of 22 players, plus the talented punter/kicker/fake punt executer Kyle Brotzman. Boise is 26-1 the past two seasons and has marquee games against Virginia Tech and Oregon State as proving grounds.

3. Texas — Despite losing the national title, the Longhorns have gone 25-2 the past two years. The highly touted Garrett Gilbert will take over at quarterback after showing some of what he could do against Alabama and Earl Thomas could be the nation’s best safety.

4. Oregon — Jeremiah Masoli returns, but Chip Kelly can seemingly win with a piƱata at quarterback. The Ducks appear to have, at least temporarily, supplanted U.S.C. as the best team in the Pac-10.

5. Texas Christian — The Horned Frogs lose only six starters from a team whose defense was No. 1 in total defense and No. 4 in scoring offense. Andy Dalton will be among the country’s top quarterbacks.

6. Florida — While the coaching situation remains in flux, the talent is still flush in Gainesville. The John Brantley era begins, which means more passing. The receiver position will go from a liability to a strength.

7. Ohio State — Terrelle Pryor will be atop most Heisman lists after he capped an uneven season with a dazzling Rose Bowl performance. Ohio State hosts Miami in the second week in one of the season’s showcase games.

8. Iowa — The Hawkeyes return 70 percent of their starters, which mean they’ll start the season high. They return starting quarterback Ricky Stanzi, a budding star in receiver Marvin McNutt and their entire defensive front.

9. Virginia Tech — Tyrod Taylor returns for his senior year with momentum from a bowl win and tons of experience. Tailback Ryan Williams is among the country’s top young runners. Bud Foster’s defenses are always stout.

10. U.S.C. — While the Trojans had a down year, the talent level in this program is still high. It will be interesting to see if Pete Carroll shakes up his coaching staff. Matt Barkley will be a poster boy for college football in 2010. But who will be throw to?

Friday, January 01, 2010

Mike Leach could coach the Raiders


Texas Tech Head Football Coach Mike Leach has been fired, as you likely know, but Michael Silver, a Yahoo! sports columnist, has a super idea -- Al Davis could hire him to coach the Oakland Raiders, the wackiest franchise in the National Football League.

As Silver explains:

Think about it: The Raiders have an abysmal offense and are trying to salvage the career of a former No. 1 overall draft pick, quarterback JaMarcus Russell. Leach is an innovative offensive mind who has made prolific passers out of far less talented QBs. Davis is a big-time meddler, but he has also worked best with headstrong head coaches who aren’t afraid to be their own men. Leach, as recent events confirm, would fit that mold. Further, as Leach proved this week, he, too, is not afraid to lawyer up, and both will soon be intimately familiar with the nuances of the term ”with cause.” Finally, Leach has a well-documented thing for pirates. Can you imagine how much he’d fun he’d have in an eye patch?

Thursday, December 31, 2009

Dylan during the decade


Jose Simian in this post on mediaite.com takes a look at what Bob Dylan did during the aughts, starting off with winning the Oscar for the song he wrote and sang for the movie "Wonder Boys" to his Christmas cover album he did for charity (pretty good video for one of the songs.)

In between the Oscar and the Christmas LP were the "Love and Theft" LP, the film "Masked and Anonymous," his memoir "Chronices" (a National Book Critics Circle Award finalist), the weird Victoria's Secret ad campaign, the "Modern Times" LP, the interesting "I'm Not There" film in which six different actors portrayed him, his radio show and Vol. 8 of his bootleg series.

Happy New Year, Bob.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Beatles Mini docs 4 Free


As a public service, and to celebrate the coming new year, The Brazosport News now provides you with the links to all 13 of The Beatles mini documentary videos that are contained in their remastered CD box set.

(We got them from the fine Beatleslane.com site.)

The viddies are:
Please Please Me

With The Beatles

A Hard Day's Night

Beatles For Sale

Help!

Rubber Soul

Revolver

Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band

Magical Mystery Tour

White Album

Yellow Submarine

Abbey Road

Let It Be

quote/unquote ...


"I have no idea what his thinking is. Something happens when you become president. They give you the plane, they give you the helicopter, everywhere you go they play 'Hail to the Chief.' You get your ass kissed 24 hours a day. You think that America can do anything."
-- Bill Maher, in Newsweek, Dec. 28th on Obama's decision on Afghanistan

"He was born in a poor home in a far-off village, and he reached the summit of power and fortune where blacks were not allowed. Off the field he never gave a minute of his time and a coin never fell from his pocket. But those of us who were lucky enough to see him play received alms of an extraordinary beauty: moments so worthy of immortality that they make us believe immortality exists."
--- Eduardo Galeano in "Football (i.e. soccer) in Sun and Shadow" about Pele

"When you see a situation you do not understand, look for the financial interest."
---- Tom L. Johnson

"What is it that renders it possible for people to make laws? The same thing makes it possible to establish laws as enforce obedience to them -- organized violence."
--- Leo Tolstoy


(editor's note: quote/unquote is typed in St. Louis by Wilson.)

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Hitler Hates the Cubs

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Saturday, December 26, 2009

Vic Chestnutt -- gone



A paraplegic who was injured in a car accident when he was 18, Chestnutt was a widely-admired performer who was supported early in his career by such top recording artists as R.E.M.’s Michael Stipe.

The 1996 tribute album “Sweet Relief II: Gravity of the Situation—The Songs of Vic Chesnutt” featured R.E.M., Smashing Pumpkins, and Madonna covering his songs.


Speakeasy, the Wall St. Journal blog, reports he took an overdose of muscle relaxants and died on Christmas Day.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Musicians who died in 2009

You know the biggies: JackO, Mary Travers ... They're here, but so are many others of whom you not be aware, via a slide show/audio sampling compiled by The New York Times.

Banjo says check it out.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Quote/Unquote

"Our neighbors have a Christmas display with polar bears. Their rear ends are pointed toward our house. Can this be the holiday spirit?"
                  -- "Town Talk" caller, Suburban Journals, Dec. 22, '09
 
"The populations of Europe, Russia and Japan are declining, and those of China and India  are levelling off. The United States alone among great powers  will be increasing its share of world population over time.  Relying on the import of money, workers, and brains is a Ponzi scheme that works."
               --- Michael Lind, the New America Foundation, in The Economist, Dec. 19th
 
"We live in the field of relativity. Things change."
                                             -- film director David Lynch
 
"'Well,' said Red Jacket (to one who complained he did not have enough time) 'I suppose you have all there is.' "
       ----- 'Society and Solitude, Works and Days'  Ralph Waldo Emerson

(compiled by Wilson in The Gateway To The West)

Peter Gammons ♥ Richard Justice


Richard Justice, the sports columnist for the Houston daily who writes a lot about baseball, catches a lot of shit from the reading public, including me occassionally, but I just read an interview on si.com with Peter Gammons who said Richie is on his "must-read" list.

So despite Justice's flip-flops, his condescension toward bloggers and his incessant hectoring of Astros owner Drayton McLane about the money he spends (or doesn't spend) for players, maybe he's worth reading for baseball fans. Make your own decision.

Here's what Gammons said:



SI.com: Who are the baseball people that are must-reads or must-watch in terms of being plugged into the sport?
Gammons: Well, I go back to my best friends at ESPN: Buster Olney, Jason Stark, Jerry Crasnick and Tim Kurkjian. They are must reads. Tom Verducci has always been a must-read. Richard Justice in Houston has always been a must read. I devour a lot and I am a great believer that there are really good Internet-based sites and blogs.



That is all I have to say about Justice, unless he resumes wearing that hayseed green suit that he once wore during an ESPN appearance (which he hasn't done since I called him out on it.)

For the time being, I wash my hands of all matters relating to Justice unless he crosses the line again.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Canada pwnd by The Yes Men

In Copenhagen last week, The Yes Men gave Dow Chemical a respite and instead turned its attention on the Canucks.

Press releases purporting to be from the Canadian contingent had been sent to journalists across the world announcing the country’s commitment to drastic reductions in greenhouse emissions. The cuts were surprising because they outstripped any previous pledges by the government. The statement was followed by a video of a Ugandan delegate congratulating Canada on its statesmanship.

If it all seemed too good to be true that is because it was. The press releases and video messages were in fact a stunt by The Yes Men, a group of pranksters.


How do The Yes Men succeed at what they do?

The Financial Times reports:

One problem many companies have in dealing with satirical pranks is that senior management often hide behind spokespeople, says Phil Hall, chairman of Phil Hall Associates, a PR consultancy, and former editor of the UK’s News of the World newspaper.

“A spokesperson is unremarkable, so when [an imposter] steps in, the public may well believe them. But if your brand is very strongly associated with a face – like Virgin and Richard Branson – you minimise this risk.” However, he says, if a company does get pranked, it must respond in some way, if only to make a statement: “If you leave a vacuum it will be filled with gossip.”

Mr Hall advises companies to rebut whatever has been said in an honest and straightforward way: “Tell the truth, then move on.”

Monday, December 21, 2009

Why we call it The Petrochemical Underarm

Some weeks ago we read a quote from Our Man in Austin, State Rep. Dennis Bonnen (R-Angleton) that the Texas Commission on Environmental Quality is doing a "good job. "

We wish he'd read this story by Chris Vogel in The Houston Press, which essentially shows how completely inadequate the petrochemical industry in Texas is regulated by the state.

Particular interesting were the comments Vogel obtained from a former member of the 3-person TCEQ board.

As regular readers of The Brazosport News might already know, we've been writing about a lot of this stuff on a piecemeal basis for years (but no much lately because, well, I don't think most people care and it got kind of boring and it was cutting into my "quiet time"), so it was good to see Vogel do a Big Picture story.

So go read the story (and if this includes Rep. Bonnen, please, sir, kindly email a comment to his post, 'cause we'd like to know what you think.)

That is all.

Heart covers a Lez Zeppelin song. No, seriously. "Evermore"

"Let's get together before we get much older, yeah, yeah, yeah ... "

Sunday, December 13, 2009

The Santa question

This afternoon Madalyn, who just turned 8, sidled up and, almost under her breath, confessed, "I'm a little confused."

About what?

Santa.

What about Santa?

I'm not sure if he's real.

What makes you not sure?

Some of the kids at school said he wasn't.

Oh. Well, does he always bring you what you want?

Yes.

Have you been good?

Yes.

Have those kids at school been good?

She turned her head, narrowed her eyes, and said, "I don't know."

Earlier in the day, Madalyn and her 4-year-old sister Ashlyn (aka "The Rascal") were taken to the local mall, where Santa was holding court. They wanted to see him, but there was a quarter-mile-long line of other kids waiting to see him, so they settled for walking by the side of Santa's throne and waving at him.

Madalyn gave a meek wave, Ashlyn gave a series of heartfelt, enthusiastic waves, and jumped up-and-down. Santa didn't respond until Ashlyn yelled out, "It's ME, ASHLYN!"

Santa, with a child on his lap, turned and waved.

+++++++

So, how did you handle the Santa question, back in the day? Would you handle the question differently if you could? Can you even remember that far back? If you can't, how would you handle it today?

Banjo wants to know.

"No one laughs at God in a war ... "

This song is from the LP "Far," by Reginka Spektor, and was named one of the best rock albums of 2009 by Associated Press writer Jake Coyle, who wrote, "There's a danger of underrating Spektor because she makes it seem so easy. The Russian-born, classically trained pianist plays bouncy, infectious pop songs that abrupty turn and soar. Resistance is futile."

Thursday, December 10, 2009

He can be a lil' kooky, but sometimes Ron Paul makes the 14th District proud

Congressman Ron Paul and Congressman Harry Mitchell are again joining forces to stop the increase in pay that Members of Congress automatically get every year unless it is voted down. To this end, they have introduced H.R. 4255, the Stop the Automatic Pay Raise for Members of Congress in FY2011. A “Dear Colleague” letter was sent out today inviting other Members to sign on as cosponsors of the bill.

Their efforts to stop the pay raise for 2010 was successful earlier this year. It is their strong belief that with high unemployment and the economic turmoil the nation continues to face, it is absolutely inappropriate for Members of Congress to raise their own pay.

“We Members of Congress should not be padding our pocketbooks when our constituents are still tightening their belts and losing their jobs,” stated Congressman Paul.


(Sent to us from Rep. Paul's press secretary, the playful yet commitedly conservative Rachel Mills)

I Feel Fine -- cuz of this

Banjo says, check it out

Dow pranked again

The Yes Men are at it again.

Monday, December 07, 2009

Friday, December 04, 2009

It's snowing and people are freakin out

It may be a sign of The End Times.

If it is, cancellation of the following local events will be the least of your problems.

However, as a public service, people in the heart of the Petrochemical Underarm of Texas might wants to know that:

• The Heart of Christmas in Angleton will not take place. No decision has been made on whether it will be rescheduled.

• The Nash 3 concert presented by the Exchange Club of Angleton has been canceled and will not be rescheduled.

• The Festival of Carols at Brazosport College has been postponed until Monday night.

• Brazosport College Drama Department's performance of "Sorry Wrong Chimney" will go on as scheduled at 8 p.m. today.

On football: Big 12 Champs & Texans-Jags


We see via our favorite sports betting emporium that the Texas Longhorns are 14.5 point favorites over the Nebraska Cornhuskers in Saturday night's Big 12 Championship game at JerryWorld in Arlington, Texas.

That's a lot of points to give in a football contest if you like the Longhorns. Be that as it may, we think the Longhorns will cover. Our advice is to go with the Horns if you are wagering, which we are not doing.

The other football contest that's of great interest in the Petrochemical Underarm of Texas is the NFL matchup between the Houston Texans and the Jacksonville Jaguars on Sunday.

The betting line at our favorite online sports betting emporium has the Texans as 1-point underdogs.

We'd take the Texans if we were wagering, which we're not, even though the Texans, quite frankly, have underachieved this year given the level of the athletic talent on the roster.

Texans owner Bob McNair has hinted that this contest is of utmost importance. A number of professional sports writers have taken this to mean that if the Texans lose on Sunday, Head Coach Gary Kubiak could lose his job. We have no idea if this is true.

The Texans-Jags game is not even a sellout in Jacksonville, which is truly pathetic because this game is as critical for the Jaguars as it is for the Texans.

It adds further ammo for those that say J'ville really is not a big league town and doesn't deserve an NFL franchise.

The Jaguars supposedly are for sale, though owner Wayne Weaver, denies it, but the scuttlebutt is he's willing to sell to someone who agrees to keep the team in northeast Florida. This significantly reduces the number of potential buyers who would be reluctant to invest $600 million to $800 million into a pro football team stuck in Jacksonville.

Look at the geographics of it. To their north lies South Carolina and North Carolina; to their northweast lies Georgia, populated by stone-cold Falcons fans, and to their south within the state of Florda are the Buccaneers and Dolphins. Jacksonville is surrounded!

In our opinion, Florida has one too many pro football teams, especially in this poor economy that has hit Florida particularly hard. (We read in the NY Times about a week ago that around 40 percent of Florida's homeowners have negative equity in their homes. We did a spit-take while sipping our Metamucil when we read that statistic.)

Our advice to Mr. Weaver and the other NFL powers-that-be: send the J'ville franchise to LA or San Antonio. Jacksonville will get over it.

We think San Antonio would do backflips for an NFL team and would be willing to cough up enough public monies to get a stadium built. Of course, we're fairly sure that Texans owner Bob McNair and Cowboys owner Jerry Jones, who both reportedly wield considerable influence in the league, wouldn't be too crazy about another NFL franchise in the Lone Star State.


(Editor's note: We have become apprised recently that the Federal Trade Commission now requires bloggers to disclose any financial arrangement they might have with certain business persons of whom they blog about. With that in mind we would like our readers and the United States federal government to know that we have an advertising agreement with Bodog, our favorite online sports betting emporium, with whom we've never placed a wager. As part of our advertising agreement, Bodog has asked that we place one hyperlinked mention of their sports betting emporium in one post in The Brazosport News, along with a standing hyperlink to Bodog that you might have noticed in the right sidebar, which has been there around 3 years or so. The Brazosport News neither condones nor discourages placing monetary wagers on sporting events, believing that citizens should what they want with their money, so long as it does no unnecessary harm to themselves, their friends and loved one, or the The Republic as a whole. The Brazosport News also acknowledges that gambling is addictive for some persons and is an acknowledged "illness" in the eyes of most psychiatrict/addiction professionals. Go Horns!)

Thursday, December 03, 2009

For $50, you now can get married in a Houston dance hall

There's a new business in Houston designed for the get-married-quick crowd, we read here in The River Oaks Examiner.

Channel 39 already has jumped on the story (see embedded viddy), choosing to focus on the really quick, spur-of-the moment, let's-fuckin'-do-it, walk-up marriage crowd. Those ceremonies all take place at the West Wind Club, conveniently located off Hwy 290 between the Sam Houston Tollway and The Loop, for only 50 bucks. There's a bar there.

The downside of that option, apparently, is that the preacher on call wears a big black cowboy hat.

And forget a sunrise ceremony. You can only do the walk-up, super quickie marriage between the hours of 4 p.m. and 1 a.m. There could be a whiff of stale beer in the air, too, though we're not sure.

 

If you want to avoid the ambience of a dance hall, there are any number of other options available by getting married via getmarriedinhouston.com.

You pick the place, time, etc.

There's no getmarriedinouston.com wedding chapel per se, all the better to contain overhead costs and give you, the marital consumer, the best possible product for you hard-earned dollars.

It looks like all the non-quickie marriage options entail dealing, at one time or another, with Paul House (as opposed to the preacher on call at the dance hall, who may be wearing a large black cowboy hat.)

Paul, we are told, was "reared" in a Christian home, and his

"biblical exploration led him to break down passages into individual word studies drilling down to the root languages of the Hebrew, Greek, and Aramaic. Throughout this detailed analysis of God’s Word, it revealed the simplistic and overlying principle of God’s Word…… God is Love!

"Paul’s personable demeanor naturally puts others at ease and makes him very approachable. He makes no pretense of being perfect or above others as clergy, but rather encourages people to look towards God’s Word to discover the simple truth that God loves each and every one of us.

"As a wedding minister, Paul has a gentle style and smoothly improvises when things do not go exactly as planned. He tells couples to not worry during the ceremony, but to relax and he will subtly give cues and direction as needed throughout the ceremony. "


If you write you own vows, Paul advises that you "keep it short."

Also, it costs more than $50 to get married via the non-quickie method, but I'll be damned if I could find anywhere on the getmarriedinhoustondotcom Web site exactly how much, although the downpayment required is a hundred bills.

No worries, though. We're sure the cost is reasonable. And look at what you're getting -- a lifetime of happiness.

You've got to hand it to the Taiwanese -- they know how to cover a Big Story

Reports Dvice

While Western news channels have been full of the usual archive footage of: Tiger's house; Tiger and wife; Tiger holding golf trophies aloft; TIger excavating his nose for gold-plated boogers, the hi-tech nations of the Far East have gone one further. Taiwanese channel Apple Action News has cranked the silly-o-meter up to eleven with an animated graphics reconstruction of what happened between Mr Golf and his Missus — and sweet Jesus and all the baby angels, it's tacky.


A new face in Bloggerville


The James A. Baker III Institute for Public Policy has decided to provide us with a "blog."

It'll be hosted on the Houston daily newspaper's Web site, but it will NOT be edited by the newspaper, which probably is a good thing as they seem to have their hands full.

We're guessing the think tank's blog won't be heavy on the snark and contain a lot of F-bombs.

Good. Enough of that around already.

The JABIPP (we just created that acronmy for the Rice U.-based institute; we think it's catchy) also recently plunged into Twitter, Facebook and launched a newsletter you can sign up for right here.

Welcome to Bloggerville, JABIPP!

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

Marlana Aref: Sis-boom-bah

Because I love football, and in an effort to boost our declining traffic, we present Marlana Aref, a cheerleader for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.



Is this wrong?

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Remembering John Whitmire, reporter


Above you will see a photo of reporters, photographers and one editor gathered in the newsroom of the late, lamented Houston Post newspaper to commemorate John Whitmire Day.


John is the fellow with the hangdog expression seated on the stool, holding his ever-present cup of machine coffee. John, who died of an aortic aneurysm around '96, was known for wearing essentially the same thing to work everyday: navy blue sportcoat, dress shirt buttoned to the toppermost of the poppermost, no tie, spit-shine black Roper boots and usually khaki trousers (he threw us all for a loop this day by wearing jeans.) He was a curious character. The boy had a such dour world-view that one afternoon during lunch, it was decided that he should have been a motivational speaker. Later that afternoon, flyers of his mug shot with the slogan "Think Positive" suddenly began appearing around the 4th floor newsroom, in the elevators, in bathroom stalls, and so forth. Soon thereafter, a John Whitmire Day was declared, so those that were so inclined decided to do their best to dress like John. This photo is not a complete sampling of those that participated since news had to be reported and meetings had to be attended.

It was gallows humor, of a kind, but who could really blame us? None of us had received a pay raise in years, yet there we still were, though our ranks were beginning to turn over more rapidly. John's ambition in life was to live in a hotel and write cheap paperback novels about crime and detectives and other such Philip Marlowe-style prose.

During his second and last tour of duty at The Post, he accomplished the former, bunking at The Houston House downtown.

He wrote some novels, or at least took an honest stab at them, but never had one published to our knowledge before he suddenly passed away one night at his San Antonio apartment, after he joined the ranks of those fleeing the failing Post.

His wife, a lawyer whom he met while covering a story about the homeless in Houston (as we recall to the best of our recollection), reported to us that he complained of indigestion that night as they lay in bed. It was much more than that, as we now know, and he died on the operating table.
Personally, I should report that I first met John while stationed in the one-man Galveston bureau of The Houston Post in the early 1980s. I was the bureau chief (get it, one-man bureau?) and he was working at the newspaper in Texas City. We met at a regularly scheduled meeting of the Galveston Press Club, which essentially was a beer drinking bullshit session at someone's home. John introduced himself and mentioned a story I had written in The Post that he enjoyed reading. It was about a guy, George Pressley, who bore a resemblance to James Young, a guitarist/vocalist with the rock band Styx. Pressley managed to pass himself off as Young in the Hitchcock area of Galveston County and in due course was convicted of having sex with a 15-year-old girl "who fell prey to his charade," reported Rolling Stone magazine on Page 18 of the July 9, 1981 issue (Margot Kidder is on the cover.) I ran across a copy of that edition of Rolling Stone the other day while rummaging through old stuff, which included the photo above this posting, which led to what you're reading now.

I kept the copy of the magazine all these years since I authored the story in Rolling Stone, which was a rehash of the story I already wrote for The Post.

I probably should have given Whitmire a cut of the $350 fee that Rolling Stone gave me, since Whitmire suggested I should try to peddle the story to the fabled rock mag. Since I didn't cut Whitmire in on that deal, maybe this remembrance of him will make up for that. He'd prefer the cash, though.

Is Gary Kubiak Texan Toast?

The head coach of the Houston Texans admitted on KILT-AM Radio that it's a fair question.


And if you follow this sort of stuff, you may recall that former Pittsburgh Head Coach supposedly said recently that Houston is one team he'd like to coach. The specific word Cowher allegedly used is it would "excite" him to take over the Texans job.

As a football fan who began attending pro games as a youth back in the George Blanda Houston Oilers days of the old AFL, there is a sizeable percentage of Texans fans that not only would be excited to see Cower's spittle flying on the sideline while chewing out an underachieving local hero, they would damn near reach karmic consciousness.

It'd cost Texans owner Bob McNair, though. Maybe as much as $10 million a year, we read somewhere. That's a lot of money to coach a football team, but McNair has got to be pretty tired of losing.

What do you think?


Thursday, November 26, 2009

quote/unquote ...

"Nowadays, women have more education and enjoy working. Women are scary now."
-- Alex Fujita of Tokyo, in an NPR piece on Japan's "herbivores," guys who are heterosexual but who say they aren't really interested in matters of the flesh and eschew the macho ways of the traditional Japanese male.
"The Puritan hated bear-baiting, not because it gave pain to the bear, but because it gave pleasure to the spectators."
-----Thomas Macauley (1800-1859)
"It was not certain. In goalkeeping, more than any other position, you are only as good as your last mistake. Trust is between the coach and the last man standing, and that presupposes that the goalie has the style, the personality and the authority that defenders in front of him also like and trust."
-- NY Times obit for Robert Enke, German national goalkeeper who committed suicide this week
"Get your facts straight, then you can distort as you please."
-- Mark Twain

(editor's note: this was compiled by Wilson in St. Louis.)

Monday, November 23, 2009

CONFIRMED! Parking scam across the street from Cowboys Stadium!!

A reader confirms our report on Oct. 27 that revealed a shocking scheme to trap budget-conscious motorists who attempt to avoid the overpriced parking fees at the fancy new Cowboys Stadium.


In the Oct. 27 post, we revealed that motorists had to fork over $300 to get their vehicles out of hock after parking at the new Wal-Mart across the street from the new football stadium in Arlington -- despite the fact there is no obvious signage warning citizens the lot is off-limits to patrons of Cowboys Stadium.


Today, we received the following e-mail:



Yep, just happened to me last weekend as well. Signs are on arlington streets and not in walmart parking lot. Towed and cost us 244.10. they even towed a shopper that wasn't attending the high school football game.

I asked walmart and they said they don't have anything to do with the towing, its the police department..yes the one that is hidden in the far right corner at the end of the lot. and yes the one that is paid by taxpayers...him, save the real crime of texas..illegal parking.

worst part is that they towed you to a building that a 2X2 shoebox for taking care of business, with no bathroom, no waiting room, number ticket system...and left us to stand in the rain for two hours while the service person took their sweet time taking money. Why would she care... its not her children out in the rain.

I am so over the cowboy stadium at this point, and will not support them in the future as its about the quality of arlington.

***


If I was an ambitious young person in the Arlington area who wanted desperately to do something noble in order to get attention to further my selfish political ambitions, I'd be all over this outrage like stink on shit (excuse my language.)

When football coaches go nuts


Mark Mangino, head coach of Kansas University, needs a chill pill. And maybe a "fuckin' hot dog."

In the ruins of a failing newspaper, a record album is born


As the once-proud flagship newspaper of the Hearst Corp. continues its descent into oblivion, a small story of hope, ingenuity and the creativity of the human spirit has emerged.

It seems Delfin Vigil, a reporter for the San Francisco Chronicle, was laid off last spring, but well before his last day on the job, he discovered an abandoned room in the newspaper's basement that looked ideal for a recording studio.

As Baynewser reports:

It wasn't so much a company-sanctioned setup as it was that Vigil, looking for a quiet place to work amid the ongoing turmoil, discovered in the basement a back room (used to store book-review books) so isolated that one had to pass through another back room (used to store newspapers) to get to it. Nearby was a bevy of abandoned printing presses and vast rooms used mainly for storing long-forgotten detritus.

A perfect place to record rock 'n roll, soundproofing included. Vigil soon took it upon himself to secret bandmates and instruments into the building on nights and weekends for sessions. His only audience: a janitor, a security guard and book-review editor Oscar Villalon, who happily relinquished sole deed to the space.

"At first I just started bringing my guitar in to work, and would go down there when I could get away," Vigil told BayNewser. "Then I started bringing in microphones and recorders. I had a whole studio overnight. Heck, I had a fridge in there. And when it came time to record, Fifth and Mission is such an easy place for everybody to meet."

Vigil's editor, Joe Brown, delighted to see someone in the building actively embrace an alternative form of artistic expression, endorsed the effort. A different editor, however, got wind of what was happening, and, under auspices that the company needed to use the space, kicked Vigil out. "Up until the day I left, they never did use that space again," he said.

Observed Vigil: "The thing about that building is the people who built it had big dreams for the place," he said. "It still has a lot of soul -- it's just that the people who run the place find new and creative ways to suffocate it."




Thursday, November 19, 2009

Obama meets Major-Major


The feud between President Obama and Fox News is simmering down, as evidenced by this video, but there's still fence-mending to be done.

quote/unquote ...

"The truth is that every morning war is declared afresh. And the men who wish to continue it are as guilty as the men who began it, more guilty perhaps, for the latter perhaps did not foresee all its horrors."
----- Marcel Proust, novelist (1871-1922)
"Do not try to live for ever. You will not succeed."
---- George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)
"The yells and animal noises which the nation listens to on the radio programme 'Today in Parliament' have nothing to do with disagreements about the way the country should be run, or how much fuel should be given to old age pensioners at Christmas time. They are cries of pain and anger, mingled with hatred and envy, at the spectacle of another group exercising the 'power' which the first group covets; alternatively, they are cries of alarm as the group in 'power' sees its territory threatened. Old age pensioners are mad if they think anyone actually cares about their wretched coal."
------- Auberon Waugh as political correspondent for The Spectator

(Editor's note: "quote/unquote" is compiled in St. Louis by Wilson, who is not on Facebook.)

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Stimulating nonexistent congressional districts

There are 32 congressional districts in the great state of Texas and not a single on goes by the name of the 91st District of Texas, which received federal stimulus money that could just as easily be given to me, because I, in fact, do exist.


What the ... ?

Watchdog.org reports $6.4 billion in stimulus money has been sent to congressional districts that don't exist.

Texas Watch Dog reports $14.7 million went to phantom congressional districts in Texas.

Government says it's just a paperwork problem, a human error problem, some people don't know what congressional districts they live in when they're filling out forms and such.

Can't wait til the government runs the healthcare system.








Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Monday, November 16, 2009

Bud $250K lighter for double rods display


A quarter million samoleans?

That's a lotta dough to lose for flipping the bird(s) at a sporting event, but when you're a role model like Bud Adams of Houston, who parlayed a $25,000 initial investment in the Houston Oilers into a team in Tennessee that's estimated now to be worth ONE BILLION dollars, it all comes out in the wash.


Bud Adams apologizes to everyone for Double Rods display yesterday

It seems like if you're 86 you shouldn't have to apologize for shooting the bird, but Bud Adams, owner of the Tennessee Titans, did anyway today.

Mr. Adams flashed double rods yesterday at the Buffalo Bills on the way to his team's convincing victory over the upstate New Yorkers, which of course was reported by the media because we all have the right to know such things.

We're not sure if this sinks his nomination for induction into the Pro Football Hall of Fame this year, but it probably didn't help.

(We've taken the position that since Ralph Wilson, the Buffalo owner, was approved for the Hall last year, Mr. Adams might as well be, too, even though we realize many Oiler fans don't care for the man. Even so, we blame then-Houston Mayor Bob Lanier for running Mr. Adams and the Oilers out of town back in the day since the powers-that-be eventually turned around and coughed up a lotta public money to build a stadium for the Texans. Oh well ...)

Anyway, Mr. Adams said his behavior was wrong, said a report from the Associated Press.

"I do realize that those types of things shouldn't happen," Adams said in a statement. "I need to specifically apologize to the Bills, their fans, our fans and the NFL. I obviously have a great deal of respect for Ralph Wilson and the history we have shared. I also understand there will probably be league discipline for my actions and I will accept those."

Whatever.
We still say, if you're 86, fuck it, you should be able to do shit sometimes without people clucking about it.






Sunday, November 15, 2009

Bud Adams gives Bills a Double Rods salute


From the Titans Insider blog:


Titans owner Bud Adams was mighty happy to see his team defeat the Bills on Sunday at LP Field.

The 86-year-old owner made an appearance on the sideline in the closing minutes, and even did a little dance as the Titans capped a 41–17 victory.

Then he turned toward the Buffalo sideline and gave the Bills the middle finger. Make that two middle fingers — Adams was using both hands.

Earlier, the native Texan flashed a "Hook em' horns" sign to fans in the West sideline seats.

It capped an eventful afternoon for Adams, who watched much of the game with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. It will be interesting to see if Goodell has any reaction to Adams' special salute to the Bills.

At least one Titan thought it was pretty funny.

"I don't know if he did it, but I condone fun things,'' cornerback Cortland Finnegan said. "If he was having fun doing it, then by all means, do what you do.''

Added Titans linebacker Stephen Tulloch: "He is a cool owner and it is good to see him around here supporting us. To have an owner like that, it's cool.''


Friday, November 06, 2009

Women's soccer? No pussies allowed!


"Fake AP Stylebook" may become a book


I've got two or three AP Stylebooks stuck in boxes around here. Not sure why I've kept them all these years. Probably should have paid more attention to them, looks like, cause now a couple of jakelegs have made up entries for a "Fake AP Stylebook" on Twitter that could become a book.

(Aside: What is an AP Stylebook? It's a book designed to answer questions about how to word stuff in a newspaper article. Reporters, in our experience, always have one handy but rarely refer to them, preferring to let editors change their copy "because that's why they're editors and that's what they're supposed to do.")

Anyway, Media Nation interviewed the founders of Fake AP Stylebook, if you want the full story.

What kind of journalistic style advice can you get from the Fake AP Stylebook?

Some examples:
* When referring to Lake Titicaca leave a lot of space afterwards for your readers to just laugh and laugh. (See also: "Ball State")

* For unnamed sources, agree on an attribution that gives the reader an idea of who it is. Ex.: "rhymes with President Bobama"

*Refer to him as "Infallible Supreme Leader of the United Smurflands" when he first appears in the article, then "Papa Smurf." afterwards.

*Always capitalize Satan. You don't want to get dead goats from those people.

* TIP: When covering City Council meetings, the Mayor is often the one wearing a large sash emblazoned with "MAYOR."




quote/unquote ...

"McKee is a longtime football fan. She is from Wisconsin. She had two statuettes of Brett Favre, the former Green Bay Packers quarterback, on her bookshelf. On the wall was a picture of a robust young man. It was McKee's son -- 19 years old, six-feet-three. If he had a chance to join the NFL, I asked her, what would she advise him? 'I'd say 'Don't. Not if you want to have a life after football.' "
--- "Offensive Play," The New Yorker, by Malcolm Gladwell, 10.09.09, referring to Ann McKee, who runs the neuropathology laboratory at the Veterans Administration hospital in Bedford, Mass.

"In the beginning, of course, there was the printing press."
--- first sentence of "Ranters and Corantos" by Richard Byrne, The Nation, Jan. 12, '09

"We're going to have a slow crawl in terms of a recovery. But the reason Warren Buffett is buying BNSF is a 10- to 20-year trend. For us near-term investors, it may seem curious. For him, the trajectory of the recovery over the next one or two years is irrelevant."
--- Matthew Troy, Citigroup analyst, about the 79-year-old Buffet buying the BNSF railroad

"It is most absurdly said, in popular language, of any man, that he is disguised in liquor: for on the contrary, most men are disguised by sobriety."
--- Thomas De Quincey (1785-1859) in "Confessions of an Opium Eater"



(Editor's Note: Compiled, per usual, in St. Louis by Wilson, whose #2 son Lou recently was named the city's "Officer of the Year" in District 9. Keep your head down, Lou!)

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

An omen?



You are familiar, I know, with various religous iconography that sometimes appear in unexpected places.

I never have experienced that personally.

But I swear to you that the above image appeared on the fence a few mornings ago. It's the fence on the east side of the house.

Obviously, the rays of the morning sun were bouncing off something and appearing on the weathered wood of the fence, but upon investigation it was unclear what in the Sam Hill was reflecting the light.

The photo, taken with an iPhone, was not enhanced at all on the computer I'm now tapping on. I do not know how and have never attempted to use the PhotoShop thing.

So I'm taking this as an omen. My life is just going to keep getting happier and happier.

That is all.

Monday, November 02, 2009

Here comes the Texas Tribune

The nonprofit digital newspaper launches tomorrow with a staff of 11 reporters who have abandoned their jobs with established daily newspapers.

Why'd they do that?

Well, some of them are making up to $90,000 per year, far more than the vast majority of their ink-stained brethren, according to this column by Howard Kurtz.