Wednesday, February 28, 2007

The curse of the moviegoer

I don't go to a whole lotta movies in the theater anymore, though I am working diligently on my phobia about all the vermin that crawl on the seats and sticky floor between showings (the medication seems to be helping some, as I actually saw TWO of the "best pic" nominated movies before the Oscars the other night.)

Be that as it may, Pete, writin in the blog called Perfectly Cromulent, reflects accurately one of the prime annoyances associated with movie-going, and that is, people who yak during the film.

In Pete's latest example, he wrote of going to see the new film "Zodiac," and enduring the agony of some "elderly" movie patrons remarking out loud about some of the actors they recognized from previous productions.

I am a man of restraint, eroding though it may be, so at no point did I leap to my feet, point at the offenders like Donald Sutherland in Invasion of the Body Snatchers, and scream, "Yes! Anthony Edwards played Dr. Mark Green on ER. No, Jake Gyllenhaal did not play Spider-Man, that was the other guy. But here's the thing: these are all ACTORS. They play different roles in different movies because that's their JOB. It would be like me walking behind you at Luby's and yelling, 'There! That's the old bat who cut me off on Richmond the other day! Doesn't she look different with a wig?'"

But no, it wouldn't matter. They'd just sit their, chatting about that nice young man who was in Wonder Boys while enjoying the Social Security payments I'll never get to see. Meanwhile, the police would be laying into me with truncheons outside.

You can see I've thought this through.


Is this an overreaction? Maybe I've just gotten to a point where I can't stand a majority of the general population.

1 comment:

mybillcrider said...

There's a great scene in one of Ed McBain's 87th Precinct novels. The cops come into the station and a guy's a the booking desk explaining why he shot some people in a movie theater. "They wouldn't stop talking," he says. "So I had to shoot them." I have a feeling McBain didn't like talkers one bit.