Tuesday, June 27, 2006

The Tao of Dow

Here's how it works at Dow (and a lot of other large corporations), according to reliable sources who shall remain nameless.

Employee A makes, let's say, around $100K.

Employee A is told, "OK, we're gonna expand your repsonsibilities, cause we really like you and you're very efficient, so you go over there and take over the duties of Employee B in Emerald City, and keep doing what you're doing right here at H.Q." Employee B made about $250K.

Then they tell Employee A, "Good. Now go take over for Employee C in Hoot Owl Holler. Spend one day in Emerald City and one day in Hoot Owl City." Employee C made about $250K.

Then they tell Employee A, "This is working out good, we want you to go take over the duties and responsibilities of Employee D in New Deal. You'll spend one day in Emerald City, one in Hoot Owl Holler, one in New Deal. And a day or two here at the Mothership. You enjoy traveling, right?"

Employee D, like Employee B and Employee C, made about $250K.

Now, the company isn't paying employees B, C or D anything anymore, cause they don't work there anymore, thus saving the company (and the all-important shareholders) around $750K.

And they don't pay Employee A, who's now handling the responibilities of four people, any extra money.

Because they don't have to. And because Employee A wants to keep his job(s).
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[dictionary.com]

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